Singledom - Boon or Bane?

Just when I walked past these people, I start to contemplate about love. I was at the sea shore strolling for some ME time. It was one of the satisfying moments amongst the beautiful climate. I climbed the rocks only to observe the engaging gestures, trifling battles, those cuddly moments, and the pissing off acts all around. I could witness Monsoon – the so called season of romance. I perceived these love birds settled, under the umbrella; had an exceptional magnetism. I just couldn't stop myself going down the deep belief - me yet being single. To add up to this, I'm always surrounded with people talking about their commitments -- through all the possible signs of communication.

Conversely, a bird on the wings supported my thought to embrace freedom. Exactly, the way I feel now - being SINGLE! I don't owe an explanation to someone. No requirement to the conventional reasoning for my acts. No insecurities regarding the acts, no affection or anticipation for unnecessary things and the list goes on. But still, a part of my mind says that it is all worth it. Significant to all the performance - be devoted to, overwhelming obsession, concerned appearance and the baby-treatment given. I am free from the overprotective conduct, when in a relation, free from the fear one wears for not losing the trust. Beyond all this, the engaging gestures made by your better half to make you smile during the uncomfortable times or when you are under the weather, surely make you feel special.

Again, the two sides of me are left unsatisfied. Is being single the best thing? Or am I missing the element of being together? But gawking at these love-doodles, I surely, did crave for love and yet again, no one to share this lost part of me. The puzzled moaning, by now was submerged in the rain.

Just as every coin has two sides, I feel the same way. I jotted down to know - do all singles feel the same? I want an answer to this – is being single a boon or a bane? Can someone please explicate?

Puzzling Night!

It was a routine and for consecutive fifteen days I was soaked with work. This night I was home by 11hours45minutes. The scorching sun outside parched me followed by the deadlines for the day, leaving me exhausted. I freshened up and reached to side-bench attached to my double bed. I arrived to John Grisham’s – The Partner, but got conscious to the to-do list for the following day. Therefore, I decided to go off to the dreamland.

I comforted myself with the spongy bedspread on me. I curled and exchanged sides but sleep dint embrace me. I grasped that it is one of those days those days, where sleepless nights have taken over. I questioned where is my alarm clock days?  Out of the blue I feel gone, bewildered and disheartened.
I adored sleeping and have been craving for a soothing one off late. But tonight, I lay on my bed while nasty thoughts engage me. I roared in my mind, I wept inside. I don't want to be friends with these gloomy nights. They munch me up and dehydrate me, leaving me forlorn and cranky for the time. Tried to escape as music intervened, but these agony thoughts poked me down the darkness. I dreaded things that shouldn't bother me. I brooded over the moments happened or shall happen the next day, which I might just not see. I asked myself -- "Why can I just not live for the moment?" I paused for a moment, inhaled the next few seconds. Oxygen comforted.  I assisted myself in retaining the optimistic remedy. Though I couldn't prevent the thoughts of blurry future, I yet pretended to calm down. I smiled by myself for the unwanted concern I accepted past an hour.  I rested facing myself to the ceiling. Trying to replicate sleep, I closed my eyes; realizing the sun was up when I opened them.

Once again this Morning, as I lazed on my bed. I realized it is with me to organize our mind-set. The thoughts, at times can be proscribed and the emotions can be replaced. We own the power to be in charge of contentment – as our Thoughts Become Action the world says. Always Keep Smiling!

The Term: BEST FRIEND

"In your happy moment, I will be there by your side. And so in harsh situations I won't leave you aside.." A promise what all friends make. A message all close friends convey. A sentence spoken by sweet and over possessive best friends.

So just by the above goody sentence is NOSTALGIA taking over? Humm...OK! Stop *pinch yourself*. Sorry for taking you back to the imaginary,the overwhelming illusionary world.
Lately, I was hit by a friend's case. She was badly hurt by her best friend who broke the trust/promise which once was the glue to their relation. The string was broken just because of a new phase in life; Just as he got his partner for life and hence he had to divert his entire share of love, comfort and attention towards her. FRIENDSHIP was no longer needed. A new meaning to friendship discovered *sarcasm*. I was shattered once again. Wondering the thought that love can diminish but can friendship too? Can friendship also vanish with time and situations? I had no words as I was taken back to my heart breaking days. The same freaking shit was given to me by the most lovable person,my guide to life,my friend and a part of my family-My Best Friend.

Today when I see two friends, I am yet struck with those divine bonds I was once connected with. I feel helpless to see myself without the most precious part of life. I was just thinking about my past best friend's. The number of friends who came and went. Feeling of nostalgia runs through the veins and Damn! I yet explode feelings alone and at times with my all time friend-Memories. I have shed gallons of water for the people leaving footprints in my heart. And yet tears roll down thinking of those people who were and yet a part of me.
Don't you think we've all had several changes in the number of best friends through different stages of life? Looking at my past experiences, I feel the term "BEST FRIEND" is highly over-rated. There is a good lesson behind this that I've learnt- getting close to people only breaks you. If people close to you can do this, then strangers can also not be trusted.
I have been making Best friends but people couldn't accept me as one is the thought making me write this. Today, when I wanted to cry on a supportive shoulder I had none. Worst was the day I wanted to celebrate my happiness I had none then too. I wish destiny does not play with people and their purest relation ever. But I will try forever and ever for this touching attachment to once, at least once, get me positively and hope my heart helps me in succeeding it.

Lifeless Relations!

Why on earth each day I hear about fights and break-ups? Each moment there is someone crying, someone going through a terrible time, misunderstanding, someone winning a break up or probably, it can be worst. Relations! I tell you. But let me clear: I don’t consider relations as only love or seeing each other. For me it includes all possible relations i.e. Love, friendship, anything that connects 2 people together would be considered as RELATION! Talk about an 8 yearlong relation or maybe 1, it can be 6 months as well; love diminishes or it gets converted to adjustments/compromise to anything. 

For instance, my friend was dating for 2 years. If you see them, you say they are madly in love. They were engaged as well. And one fine day, he comes to me and says: “I have moved on” reason being too much of fights. Like can fights have no solution? Or probably they are bored of each other? Or may be expectations are left unfulfilled? 

Another instance would be of that of best of friends. People are known to be loved more by friends rather than lovers, yet there are people giving up on friends just as they have entered into a new relation. Imagine years long or probably childhood friends giving up their friendship for the new relation. Immaturity, How foolish can this be? I have always been of the view that friendship lasts long. But after I witnessed this, I was shocked. Left broken and in a way felt betrayed. I agree to a point that they have their priority/preference set on their loved ones, but that doesn’t mean that the entire friendship is on a toss. Is it really??

Another would be that of father son relation. A son throws his parents out once he is able to earn, settled, satisfy him. What about the years where his parents have struggled to get him to this phase? I don’t understand why we are being so materialistic for each and every thing in life.

 I find it very crappy as when one chooses a relation over the other. Things have been changing over the years. Earlier, relations were maintained till death. As time passed, relations have been on toss for materialistic reasons. My point is why can’t we give more and expect less? Why can’t we handle all relations together? Why are we giving up on everything, which once we loved, just to satisfy our ego?

My motive for this is solely to spread a message amongst everyone about things happening around intentionally/ unintentionally. Do you have any idea why? Please let me know.